Natalie Dormer on Women and Body Image in Hollywood during SDCC 2014 (x)
50 Shades of Abuse Flyer - Canada
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Okay. I understood all the flack Twilight got for being an abusive relationship. Because it was and it was being read by a very young and impressionable audience. But ffs, 50 Shades is an ADULT NOVEL. Iit is about a BDSM couple. Which - newsflash - do exist. It is a completely consensual form of dominate/submissive sex play. The whole concept of domestic violence and abuse is that one side exerts control over an unwilling victim. I don’t recall Anastasia, or whatever she’s called, protesting to Christian’s form of sex. If I remember correctly, she quite enjoyed it! So before you condemn a work of romanticizedfiction, actually consider it’s audience and remember that they are mature and capable enough to know the difference between reality and fiction.
so i guess you didn’t read the parts where he coerces her and the part where he continues after she has used her safeword and acts like a fucking creep whenever they aren’t having sex
it is the worst possible introduction to BDSM i could imagine
i know my shit okay
im hoping the people defending this book are 1. never getting into BDSM 2. not currently into BDSM 3. havent read the book bc i dont want to believe anyone is that fucking stupid
knowledge on you right now.
Wanna know the BDSM mantra? Safe, sane, consensual.
So let me explain why this book was devoid of all three of these things.
Safe - In the first few chapters of the novel, Christian Grey tracks Ana’s cell phone to find her at a club. Takes her home when she’s drunk, changes her when she’s so intoxicated she doesn’t remember him doing so,and informs her he will be keeping tabs on her for her own benefit. This is not the behaviour of a respectable Dominant. This is the behaviour of a power hungry, abusive asshole who really can’t take no for an answer.
Sane - One of the most important parts of BDSM is aftercare. Scenes can be extremely traumatizing and intense for the submissive. Aftercare is anything from petting to cuddling to holding to sweet talking, whatever degree of gentleness a bottom would need to pull them out of “subspace”. How does Christian provide aftercare? He submits Ana to a traumatizing first time spanking experience AND THEN FUCKING LEAVES. AND GETS MAD THAT SHE DIDN’T TELL HIM SHE WAS UPSET. He’s the one who should fucking know better! That, again, is not the act of a responsible Dominant. It’s the act of a selfish abuser.
Consensual - Did I mention he undressed her when she was belligerently drunk? Tracked her phone to locate her? He also buys her a new car despite her saying no countless times. Now, consent is important for any kind of sexual activity at all. Consent means informed, consent means enthusiastic. Informed, enthusiastic consent. This is crucial in a BDSM setting. Scenes can be extremely intense, especially for the bottom. What is Christian’s form of obtaining consent? Handing Ana a fucking contract highlighting all the things he wants to do her asshole and asking her to sign it. She was a virgin (Don’t even get me fucking started.) who had never before been exposed to BDSM. Entering in that kind of relationship takes a gargantuan amount of trust and knowledge so you know exactly what you’re getting into. Not reading a list of kinks on a piece of paper and signing your rights to say no away. Christian didn’t offer her resources, he didn’t offer her information. He gave her an ultimatum. That is not the sort of consent a responsible Dom/me would seek from their submissive.
Fuck. This. book. It’s written in a shitty way, it’s a terrible example of a BDSM relationship (ask anybody already involved in the lifestyle and watch them go blue in the face just thinking about it), which is already faced with enough prejudice and misunderstand, and it romanticizes and glorifies abuse.
And this post is going into my bookmarks, because it is beautiful.
What scares me most is the fact that people, misinformed and ignorant people, will now try to enter the community/find play partners with the dangerous ideas of what BDSM is. They won’t respect a sub, they won’t listen.
And that can seriously hurt people. People can DIE.
denny’s reminds you to behave accordingly at this weekend’s festivities. we also remind you that after you’re all con-ed out, we’d love to see your costumes and serve you late into the night. cosplayers are welcome at dencon 24/7.
Denny ‘s gets it. It can’t be that hard can it?
Direwolves or Dragons? (x)
Anonymous said: Not every character is going to make the cut. I dont see what the big deal is.
Okay, so I’m tired and have a headache so I’m not going to respond to this as in depth as I should, but let’s look at some facts:
There were 5 founding Avengers: Tony Stark, Thor, Bruce Banner (Hulk), Hank Pym, and Janet van Dyne (Cap wasn’t one of them, he didn’t show up until issue 4!). Of those 5 founding members, we have Tony Stark: 5 movies, 3 solos; Thor: 4 movies, 2 solos; Bruce Banner: 4 movies, 2 solos; and Hank Pym, 1 movie. Out of those 5 founding members, 1 of them is female. Out of those 5 founding members, 1 of them isn’t getting into a movie at all, much less their own movie.
OH WHOA THOSE TWO OVERLAP FOR SOME REASON?????????
Okay, so, whatever. Not everyone gets their own movie, right? Nevermind that Jan found Captain America, named the Avengers, is the reason Jocasta EXISTS, chairpersoned the team more times than I can honestly remember right now but at least 3 times, is #5 on the most important Marvel heroes list of all time (and would be number 1 if the Avengers voted on it, according to the list makers’ own admission). (Beating out, for the record: Hank Pym (7), Black Widow (10), Vision (6), Luke Cage (12), Beast (13), Quicksilver (14), Falcon (15), Hulk (18), Spider-Man (25), Iron Patriot (31), Havok (36), Ant Man (Scott Long, 46), Iron Fist (46), and Jessica Jones (49) ALL OF WHOM are getting big or small screen treatment before she is. Never mind ALL OF THAT.
They’re making an Ant Man movie, right? So okay, cool, obviously Ant Man is going to be in it. But which one? There’s two! Hank and Scott. Oh, turns out, they’re gonna do both.
So they didn’t cut either Ant Man, they’re shoehorning BOTH of them into one movie. Huh, okay, cool! Both of them made the cut, I guess. Biggest bang for their buck.
You know who isn’t making it into the movie at all? Well that’s kinda… weird. I mean, it seems relevant, you know? But hey, I guess not everybody is going to make the cut!
And Jan, right? She doesn’t matter. It’s not like she literally carried Hank through at least 5 breakdowns. It’s not like SHE’S the one who wanted to be a superhero in the first place and encouraged him to use his research for that. It’s not like SHE defeated Ultron HERSELF MULTIPLE TIMES. She’s definitely not relevant at all to Hank’s story. Oh, and even BETTER. Let’s just COMBINE these two women into one woman! Rather than give Hank a wife and partner who can support him, we’ll give him a daughter who… something. And rather than give Scott a daughter who will be his entire origin story, we’ll give him… Hank’s daughter?
Put all of that aside, seriously. Take EVERYTHING I just said and completely disregard it. You know why it’s bullshit Jan got cut? Because she’s a woman who is feminine and also kick butt. She’s a woman who can be ditzy and brilliantly cunning. She’s flighty and carefree while being a strong, commanding leader who wins the respect of everyone who works under her. She loves fashion AND punching bad guys in the face. She thinks being a hero is all fun and games until she learns responsibility and severity, but even then keeps her compassion and empathy. Jan is an important, DIFFERENT role model for men and women alike that the MCU HASN’T SEEN BEFORE. Hank and Scott, sorry to say, are characters WE HAVE SEEN BEFORE. Hank is a scientist who is tortured by his genius but feels the responsibility to do good with it. Been there, done that, bought the neck brace. Scott is a guy down on his luck just trying to hold it together for his family and gets sucked into a life of crime. Pretty sure I just summarized every show that has ever aired on AMC. But you know what Jan is? Jan is a female action star who isn’t either 1.) a prodigy child confused by her own powers, or 2.) a stone-cold ultra killer with the toughness of steel. Not that there’s anything WRONG with those archetypes: what’s wrong is that’s the ONLY TWO you see women satisfying in action movies (besides love interest, of course).
Full disclosure: out of all the Marvel characters, I’m probably the most like Carol Danvers. But I LOVE JAN because she’s DIFFERENT. I think Jan might even be more important than Carol to get onto the big screen because she’s not just like one of the guys. She’s not tough in a masculine way. She has a pixie haircut and designs costumes and tries not to break a nail. But she does it while being a BRILLIANT leader and a FIERCE warrior. It’s something we NEED to show on screen. It’s something little girls and little boys NEED to know is possible. I sure would have benefited from it as a kid, at least.
That’s why you can’t just accept that Jan didn’t make the cut.
Loki Week: Day Three - Magic
An Old Norse term for a type of sorcery practised in Norse society. Seidr practitioners were of both genders, although females are more widely attested, with such sorceresses being variously known as vǫlur, seiðkonur, and vísendakona. There were also accounts of male practitioners, known as seidmenn, but in practising magic they brought a social taboo known as ergi onto themselves, and were sometimes persecuted as a result. Within pre-Christian Norse Mythology, seidr was associated with the god Odin, as well as the goddess Freyja, a member of the Vanir who was believed to have taught the practice to the Aesir.
i get that you’re trying to be concise and all but you’re missing a lot of really cool—and really relevant—stuff, like the fact that the concept of ergi is intimately connected with transgender people1. academia being academia, it gets swept under the rug a lot, but the connection is there. seiðmenn are not inherently argr; although it’s a common enough reference and accusation, avoided most often by being of a high enough status nobody wants to start anything. See: óðinn2. his status is also complicated by the fact that seiðr is not the only type of magic he practices; galdr, which he uses much more often, is considered an almost purely masculine form of magic, along with runic magic. galdr is a form of magic which uses musical incantations. runic magic is pretty self-explanatory.
Then there are the two more ‘effeminate’ forms of magic: seiðr and spá. seiðr is a very broad category of magic; it encompasses illusions, battle-magic, prophecy, causing physical phenomena such as earthquakes and storms, potion-brewing, healing, and shapeshifting, amongst other things3. it has certain connotations of evil and untruthfulness behind it because of what seiðr-workers can do. spákonur and völur, by comparison, work specifically in the realm of prophecy, or what is called ørlög: the law of how things shall be, as laid down by the norns. the prophecy of a seiðr-worker is not the same sort as that of a spákona; rather than perceiving ørlög directly, the seiðr-worker gains the knowledge of it by using the spell vardlokur, that is, summoning spirits4.
argr amab seiðr-workers are sometimes called seiðskrattar5. another term is seiðberendr6; sometimes considered a way to refer to any seiðr-worker because berendi literally means “carrier”, however it was used often as a term for the womb7, and has connections to transwomen who used witchcraft to combat their dysphoria8.
loki is innately connected to the concept of ergi; one of their kennings is rög vættr, another áss ragr—both can be translated as, roughly, “the queer god”9. they have been a mother several times, and they are said to have given birth to all witches10. (let’s assume that’s metaphorical.)
despite not often being brought up in mythological discussion as a seiðberendi, their status as such is inarguable. strangely, though, their most obvious use of magic, their shapeshifting, doesn’t appear to be the traditional sort of shapeshifting used by a seið-worker. a shapeshifter in this vein is called an hamhleypa11, and while they take on new forms, their native body lies inert. if you’re familiar with discworld, you’ll recognise granny weatherwax as an hamhleypa, though she’s not named as such. of course, given that loki embodies the liminal, boundary-crossing aspects of seiðr, perhaps that should be expected of them.
1 schnurbein; shamanism in the old norse tradition
2lokasenna, et al. “en þik síða kóðu/sámseyu í,/ok draptu á vétt sem völur;/vitka líki/fórtu verþjóð yfir,/ok hugða ek þat args aðal”
3 callaghan; magic beyond the binary: magic and gender in the poetic edda
4 eiriks saga rauda, et al.
5sørensen; norrønt nid: forestillingen om den umandige mand i de islandske sagaer (sidenote: in modern icelandic, skratti now means “demon”. gotta love christianisation.)
6hyndluljóð, et al. “ero völur allar frá viðolfi/vitkar allir fra vílmeiði/seiðberendr frá svartöfða/iötnar allir frá ymi komnir”
7 strömbäck; sejd: textstudier i nordisk religionshistoria
8 fritzner; ordbog over det gamle norske sprog
9 ergi as a concept is difficult to define; it’s often said to mean “unmanliness”, but that’s a vast simplification. it comes from proto-indo-european h₃orǵʰ-, meaning “to have sex” (which comes to modern english, incidentally, in the form of “eerie”), defined by seiðberendr both in the past and present as not only gender transgressing behaviour and/or sexual activities but being, essentially, ‘out’, willingly taking on the taboos associated with them.
10hyndluljóð. “varð loptr kviðugr at kono illri,/ϸaðan es á foldo flagð hvert komit”
11 simpson; the witch figure
The final of our #SDCC 45th Anniversary 45¢ comics is the Queen & Country Vol. 1: Operation: Broken Ground by Greg Rucka (Check him out at ruckawriter)
Head over to comixology.tumblr.com/cci45 to find out how to get today’s book, but act quickly because these codes expire at 11:59pm ET tonight!
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